Hey, I was hoping you would check out my Blog.

Thanks for coming by to check out my random musings. I hope you get to know a little more about me, and maybe by doing so will understand just a little more why I am the way I am. Take a look around, feel free to ask a question, and please stow all person items under the seat in front of you.

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Dude started a fire with his ball?

Hi, I play golf ! Did I tell you about my fire starting balls?

Yes, I do look for the most out of the ordinary stories to spin...

It looks like Snake - Gate 2010 is winding down.

How in creation are we going to fill the lull of snakes maybe hiding in buildings or maybe hiding in the gift shop next to the post cards?

Thank goodness for this unnamed pal who started a fire by rubbing his ball in the brush.  We are going to call unnamed dude Hairy for the sake of the Blog.

Let's review this from my warped point of view. I imagine Hairy is probably duffing it up with his weekly Nassau and is going broke on his $10 a hole bet.  You know by this point he has knocked back a few cold ones and has made his way to the back 9 for a troublesome climax to his round.  Hairy undoubtedly has scuffed his balls up pretty bad from a long round at the local muny.  Hairy reaches for his favorite wood and checks the yardage, backs off and grasps his weiner he ordered from the cart girl.  Hairy undoubtedly put copious amount of Mayo on his lunch and asks for a towel to clean up the mess he made in his hands.  Luckily, Hairy recently regripped his shaft and that makes all the difference in the world when you are staring at the business end of a Dog-leg.  Hairy wonders if the Extra Stiff shaft he purchased will be the difference maker in his round .  It has already been a tough outing and Woody has not placed his balls in an opportune location all day.  You see Hairy and Woody go together like Beans and Franks or Twigs and Berries.  Whenever Woody is poking his head around the golf course...Hairy is likely right there with him. 

Anyway, as Woody did a real number on the last hole he encountered , his team gets the honors.  Hairy's balls are in for a real treat today as Hairy is looking at swingin' with the old Niblick.  The  surrounding countryside is a little parched today, but that is OK because the local forecast calls for Showers of Gold in the near future...that's golden indeed.  Hairy eyes his balls, looks squarely at the Dog's Leg, again intently on his balls.  Then Hairy unleashed the 'ole licker on his balls with the fury of an Irish AA meeting. 

Then the impossible happens, the lack of moisture around the vicinity of the crook in the Dog's Leg causes a strafe and next thing you know old Hairy watches his balls start smoking under tremendous duress.  Hairy looks on in horror as the near side of the Dog's Leg is now on fire..."surely my balls didn't ignite the bushiness of the Dog's Leg?!?

I guess only Hairy's Balls, Woody's Shaft and the unmoistened Dog's Leg will ever know for sure.

I believe I have just shamed my family once again. Thanks and keep reachin' for the stars CorleyBlog.











No comments:

Post a Comment